Why do Kids lie? How to tackle and correct it?

My friend was aghast when her 4-year daughter told he that her father wore her bra sometimes when she was sleeping on his T-shirt; lies like this is quite common among many young children, who profess them to be true. Parents may be confused if they need to insist that their children be honest or just let it go to avoid crushing the child’s creativity.

Some child psychiatrists are of the opinion that it is quite common and not wrong for kids to tell lies; some very young children rarely understand the difference between truth and fiction. Some lying may be a sign of good things, while some preschoolers with high IQ scores may lie, with early lying proficiency being linked to good social skills in adolescence.

It is futile to laugh off all lies of kids as most parents would like to raise honest children; it is good that parents learn the type of lies kids tell and why, so that they can guide their children towards truthfulness that is appropriate to their age.

All about lies toddlers tell:

I was very amused when my friend Geeta’s twins, Ramesh and Suresh escaped the rigmarole of a diaper change by lying about it; when asked they simultaneously said the other’s name. These are the first lies toddlers or preschoolers as young as 2 or 3 years would tell you, with these lies told either to deny they did something or to gain something for oneself.

It is futile to punish toddlers for telling lies as they are too young to understand that they are doing the wrong. Toddlers could also quote imaginary friends/people when asked about their doings. Never insist on making your toddler feel he/she did the wrong; a even better strategy would be to suggest a vase was broken instead of asking if he/she broke one. An angry accusation would only lead to a lie.

All about the lies preschoolers tell:

Preschoolers are little ones that tell small tales for this is the age of invisible friends, horned monsters and talking rainbows. Your 3year old would be basking in the companionship of imaginary sisters; you could not consider this as a lie as most preschoolers exist in a fantasy world of tremendous colorfulness, prominence, and importance of his imaginary friends that they believe is real.

Parents need to keep these tell tales in the proper perspective and be happy if the child is happy and keeping realistic relationships with the important people in their life; they are simply the child’s own way of processing ideas.

All about lies school children say:

School children are more mature and have reasons to tell lies; Mohan confessed pilfering his newborn sister’s bracelet when his mother yelled and cajoled and refused Sunday breakfast until one of the brothers confessed. The reason he gave was he wanted his mother to stop asking; then his brother Dinesh who actually did it burst into tears.

Some children of that age tell white lies that benefit someone else or avoid hurting someone’s feelings; it depicts a bit of social awareness and sensitivity. It is also found that kids this age lie for understandable and forgivable reasons like disappointing their parents or getting a punishment in spite of best efforts. All this calls for parents to find out why their children lied and considerer the reason before punishing them.

All about lies tweens say:

Tweens have been rightly said to be growing fast and stretching the truth, with tweens hiding details of certain parts of the life that they shared freely earlier. Your child may be a bit secretive; secretiveness is a sign of the child’s growing maturity, your fears are only right if your child still shared everything.

Some tweens may lie occasionally about homework, chores or tooth brushing; the best response lying in expressing one’s displeasure. Chronic tween liars might need professional assistance to sort things out; the reasons for this lying could be the child being stress or too smart to find lying as a convenient tactic.

The best way to steer a tween to greater honesty is to not lie yourself; set a good example yourself and tell him/her how lying could question their credibility and relationships works in most cases. Let’s hope the lesson sinks in and your child grows out the fibbing and grows into an honest-to goodness adult.

Have you tackled your child’s lying?  

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